Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
