i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
third nipple confirmed
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
that is very illegal...i love you.
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