My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
this boner is exhausting
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
