the new term for farting is butt boxing.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
