Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
