Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize
