i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
