beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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