Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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