Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
