whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
