am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
