I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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