You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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