All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
be right there i have to get my cape
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize
