ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
