chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Did I show you my penis last night?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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