No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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