just come out here and I will go home with you...
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Randomize
