I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
