Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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