Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
