i always forget guys have bellybuttons
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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