he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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