i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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