I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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