you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize