i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
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