You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
