Capitaan dildo arrescate!
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
