oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Randomize
