Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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