btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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