I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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