I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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