Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
