I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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