nut hugger
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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