what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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