i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize