You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
