She's JV to your varsity
I just gift wrapped bread.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
