i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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