Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
