oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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