She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize