Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
