my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize