But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
