Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
